Personal FAQs

Here are answers to commonly asked questions I receive, in no particular order:

Biggest and smallest penises I have encountered

The biggest I’ve ever had was 9.5 inches and the smallest was probably 3-4 inches; both were difficult in different ways. The big one became very painful very quickly, especially with the extra friction from a condom, and I couldn’t manage many traditional positions. The smallest belonged to a guy who was a terrible lover; he didn’t care about my pleasure at all, and thought he was bigger than he actually was. I never corrected him but I was mentally laughing at his ego. Suffice to say that Small Boy only had one chance and never heard from me again.

My preferred penis size

I generally prefer anywhere from 6.5 inches to 8.5 inches at the absolute most. But I won’t turn down a potential lover if they fall outside that range because vaginal sex is only one part of sexual activities. It doesn’t take a well-endowed man to bring most women, myself included, immense pleasure.

Best and worst lovers I’ve had

My worst lover was Small Boy, as mentioned above, but once again not because he was small. His selfishness and ego, and total disinterest in making me feel good, are why he was awful. Had he actually cared about my pleasure even a little and he might have redeemed himself.

My best lover was a brief but intense affair. He was very passionate about pleasing me, not only for my sake, but because he genuinely got off on making me orgasm. It was almost like he could orgasm just from making me climax. He would beg to be allowed to please me – although not in a submissive way – because he loved doing it so much. He loved the scent, taste, and sight of women and femininity. His enthusiasm and passion were extremely arousing to me and made me feel relaxed and comfortable around him. He legitimately worshiped my body; he helped me feel sexy and cherished.

Best and worst sexual experiences

My best sex was the first time with my best lover, as described above. I was surprised because usually the first time with someone new involves a lot more fumbling and sloppiness than actual pleasure. But that first time we were together, when I experienced that level of passion, was something I’ll never forget.

I’ve had plenty of awful sex before, but there’s one specific instance that comes to mind as being among the worst. I was with my high school boyfriend and we were going at it. Right when I was about to orgasm, I heard one of my cats barfing up a hairball in the room. It completely ruined the moment and we couldn’t recover from the interruption that night. We laughed about it but I remember feeling extremely frustrated.

Turn ons, turn offs, and dealbreakers

My particular turn ons include blue eyes, being taller than me, and intelligence. If someone can talk philosophy or politics with me, I’ll be way more interested than some chiseled idiot. Also compassion, kindness, and an open mind are really big. Sure there are plenty of physical traits I love (like a cute butt!), but a personality can make or break attraction for me. As an example, I once worked with a guy who I thought was very, very sexy. I loved staring at him. Then one day he spewed vitriolic, misogynist nonsense from his mouth-hole and the attraction was instantly gone. It never came back.

I have several major turn offs: selfishness, egotism, willful ignorance, rudeness, and right-wing blabbermouths (see: Donald Trump). Again the basic physical appearance is much less important than personality, integrity, and strength of character. Also I really hate when men wear socks during sex.

I have only a few select dealbreakers: when someone doesn’t speak English fluently (that becomes a communication issue); guys who don’t trim their toenails; not liking animals (in a platonic way – I just don’t trust someone who can’t connect with animals on some level); people who judge others for stupid reasons; and people who are pushy. Anyone trying to impose their values on me will get an earful and/or blocked; I don’t judge you, so you don’t get to judge me. End of story.

I also feel inclined to post this disclaimer: EVERY WOMAN IS DIFFERENT. What I find attractive or repulsive is totally irrelevant. You need to find someone who YOU find attractive, and who reciprocates that sentiment.

Best and worst ways to meet someone

I am in no way an expert on this subject. I have met people in many different ways: online, through mutual friends or friends of family members, at common activities (school, work, etc), and randomly. What I can do is give a breakdown of how many people I’ve met through different activities as follows:


In a future post, I will review various dating apps and websites based on my personal experiences. Online dating seems to be the way to go these days for many reasons; it’s certainly an arena that’s expanding rapidly.

Happy playing!

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